Monthly Archives: July 2010

I have the midsummer blahs. Even though it’s not midsummer, whether one calculates by the sun (which makes midsummer June 21 or so), or by dividing in half the number of days off between the end of school and the beginning of school in the fall. Either way, we’re closer to the end than to the beginning of summer. I don’t know whether that makes me nostalgic, desperate or just tired. Maybe all three.

Anyway, we’ve gone up to Dallas for a birthday party, we’re home again, and I’m having a whole lot of trouble getting motivated to Do Anything. Alas.

It’s not just the writing that’s been left gasping by the wayside. Pretty much everything else is too. Exercise, cooking, shopping for groceries–I just want to be a slug and read, or maybe sleep. Sigh. Gradually, I am forcing myself to get things done. I went to the grocery store yesterday. I’ve folded most all the laundry (except for what is still in the dryer, and the fella doesn’t really need his underwear that bad–he has more). I do go outside and comb the granddog. (She has short pit-bull fur, but likes to be combed, cause it scratches her itches.) But she will let me sit on the glider and read while I comb/scratch her. (When I scratch her, my fingers come away with dirt on them, she gets so dirty. And yes, she gets baths. And immediately goes to dig/roll in the dirt and replace her dirt.)

Anyway, yes, I am a tired slug who is doing as little as possible and feeling terribly guilty for it, but not enough to stop being a slug. I’m wallowing in my slugness. It IS easy being a slug, and I like it. So there. I may have to take a “writers weekend” to finish this dang book. I could definitely stand to escape to Valley Mills or some other similar place for a few days. Even though I just did… Ah well. Hopefully I’ll be able to scrape the slug coat off soon.

Those of you who check in periodically with my blog may have noticed how I’ve really been fighting to get the current Work in Progress finished.

This is different from the fight with the previous book. That fight began because I was trying to put two books’ worth of plot into one, and because I had 50 bazillion relatives (okay, only 25) show up in town the month I was trying to get the book finished. I think I may have mentioned on this blog that I wondered whether it was more of a psychological struggle than an actual “work time” struggle. That I’ve had this book living in the background of my life for so long (years) that I’m ambivalent about actually finishing it and sending it out into the cold cruel world. That doesn’t mean it’s any less frustrating.

Anyway, over the weekend, I went to a workshop/writer’s retreat event. I had planned to go with my best buddy Belinda, but she had to stay home and take care of grandbabies while their mama was in the hospital. I thought about canceling when she couldn’t come, but decided no, I really needed to go, even though the grandboys were in town all week, and I went to Slitherbahn on Thursday and wore myself out and had to get up really early on Friday to get all the way across Houston to the event… Yes, that is a long-ass sentence. Deal. End result is, I went, and I was glad.

It was structured with workshops in the morning, and writing time in the afternoon, and yes, I did have to lie down on the sofa where I was writing and take a little naplet so I didn’t fall asleep over the writing. Afternoons are not my best writing time. But I wrote. And I listened. And I took an appointment with the creativity coach person, Kathryn Lorenzen. Her reaction was that–yes, you may be resisting the end of this book. Because I’m dealing with an awful lot of transitions and things right now, including my youngest graduating from college. It may be easier to send him out into the world if I hang onto the book I’ve been “raising.” Basically, I need to be nicer to myself, while still showing up to work as close to every weekday as I can.

And, even though I had my naplet every afternoon I was there, I got about 3 pages written every day I was there. Maybe a little more. I pushed through a lot of the “buildup” stuff, and started getting excited about reaching the ending. And in my writing this week, I think I’m there. My hero has had his plane shot down. He’s been captured. The heroine is sailing her little sailboat closer. She’s had a fight with her dead husband. Things are happening, and I’m hoping I can get this all wrapped up, 100-plus words at a time, before the daughter, son-in-law and grandson come to visit in August.

Wish me luck.